It is once again that time of the year when we sit down and “count our Blessings”.
Personally, I have a ritual of writing a “milestone article” during this period every year.
It helps me do 3 major things:
- Take stock of important things I did in the year under review,
- Help me see “How Far” I have come from the last milestone article I wrote. This is the link to the article I wrote about this time in 2018.
- Set Goals and aspirations for the coming year.
So how has 2019 been for You?
Here are my major lessons for this year;
- Family is everything.
- Most of the bullshits You waste your time on, do not matter.
- Optimize!; Your Life, your Relationships, Your Time… Do all You can to clear up clutter
- The 4th Industrial Revolution is upon us, the Future of Work is gradually becoming the present of work, do all You can to acquire a relevant skill in line with Deep Technologies.
If You want to read a more comprehensive story, then continue reading…..
I did a lot of “slowing down” in the year, I took major (life) decisions earlier in the year and then “slowed down” to observe how those decisions will play out in real life.
Some of the major things I did this year were;
- I got married to my Girlfriend of 7 years.
- I relocated from Enugu State to Lagos.
- I had a near death auto-Crash but thankfully, I came out un-scratched.
After these major 3, I decided to “slow down”, do the “necessary basics” and enjoy the bliss that comes with “every day Life”.
How did these things affect my Life Style in the course of the year?
- On Getting Married:
If You have been with someone who has “coped” with You for 7 years+, I do not think some Church ceremony and a Reception should suddenly change the way You guys relate.
Christiana has been my friend (and many other things) for over 7 years+ and that has and will not change.
Well, except, I have to take permissions these days and give plenty explanations as to WHY, HOW, WHAT , WHERE, WHO, WHOM I needed to see.
It is a different ball game when You are a “Boyfriend” or Fiance and when You wake up one morning and You are somebody’s Husband.
And of course random strangers asking You why You are not wearing your wedding ring on days You forget and when they want to come for naming ceremony.. I am still recovering from the Wedding Expenses fam!!!.
Asides all these, all is in order. We thank the good Lord!
2. Relocating to Lagos
I resided in Enugu State for 5 years (2014-2019) and the Coal City has been part and parcel of my Life, but, there comes a time in Life when we all need to bid farewell to the People and Places we love and move on to “greater things”.
If You have had any cause to visit or live in Enugu, You will understand that Enugu is too gentle, cool and serene for anybody to wake up one day and say He/She is leaving such an ambience especially when You are relocating to an overcrowded congested maze like Lagos.
In this terrain, everyone is in a hurry for no reason, the next guy has been schooled on “how He should not be dull in Lagos” so his default setting is to be aggressive and paranoid, Nobody came here to “count bridges” so they are looking for the very next opportunity to swindle You and blame You for being “dense”.
In the midst of all the chaos, I appreciate the presence of massive Economic Opportunities, the Atlantic Ocean and the Lagoon at least one can escape to have his head cooled off with the breeze from the beaches.
I do not know if I will ever “adapt” to the Lagos lifestyle but I am coping just fine.
3. My first (and last) major Accident.
On that fateful day in September, I was on my way to Lagos from Asaba, Delta State where I had gone to execute yet another successful project ( talk about na the work we dey do), the first red flag was spending 1 hour around the Ovie River in Edo State where an accident had claimed several lives and there was a gridlock caused by the activities of Road Safety officials trying to move dead bodies and injured travellers to the nearest medical facility.
I left that scene thanking God for life, drove past Ore in record time, I was somewhere on the Shagamu-Ijebu Ode express way when the unfortunate incidence happened.
The road was big enough to take 2 vehicles, I was on my own lane, right adjacent me was a Trailer on his own lane too, within the twinkle of an eye, the trailer was right in front of me apparently trying to avoid a collision with another trailer in front of him who had suddenly come to a halt.
The rest they say is history. Thankfully, the trailer was in motion so my Car did not run into a stationary object.
At that point, I wasn’t even concerned about myself, I was concerned about the young lady who got married in April and was about becoming a widow in September. I was concerned for my Dad and how he will take the news of the tragic death of his first son.
The Car suffered severe damages, I came out un-scratched and I am thankful for Life.
Those 3 incidences were my major highlights for the year.
Here are my key takeaways for the year.
1.Family is everything:
In the face of death, nothing else matters. If I had died on that fateful day in September, who would be most affected?
- My Office? Well, maybe for a week or two till someone else steps into my shoes.
- My “Personal Brand” and followers on LinkedIn and Facebook? I do not think so!
- The folks who view my Whatsapp Status? You must be kidding me!
The best I would have gotten from these people are RIPs, less than 60 seconds of silence and everybody will return to their “Gbe Bodying” as if nothing happened.
If I had died or suffered any major injuries, the people who would be affected will be my family;
Christiana my friend and wife who would be made a widow in less than 6 months of getting married, my Dad who is just recovering from a stroke, Dammy my only Brother, Elizabeth and Mary my 2 Sisters; these are the people who would have lost a Husband, a Son and a Brother.
Moving forward, Family is the most important item on my itinerary.
In my absence, every other thing; Work, Thought-Leadership, Tech, Startups et al will go just fine… it is my family that will not remain the same.
I do not think You need a “near death experience” to place value on your family.
2. Most of the Bullshits You are doing do not matter
Well, the accident did not kill Me so it didn’t kill “my inner rebel” either.
When I decided to “slow down” this year, I stopped doing a lot of things I used to do and You know what I found out? Every One and everything did just fine.
That is to say, I can actually reduce or stop worrying over most of the things I carried on my head and everyone will do just fine.
There are folks who happen to be on my payroll without any formal employment and I decided to stop the credit alerts for a month or 2 and nobody died, I stopped posting stuffs on Social Media and everyone did just fine, I stopped reaching out to some folks and my life and their’s wasn’t affected.. AKA, You can strip your work load by 80% and You will still do just fine or if You like replace the 80% space with more important things (your choice).
Moving into the year;
I will spend most of my time with Family,
I will learn and apply more Future of Work Technologies (FOWTECH),
Make good Money and enjoy life with my Family,
I also plan to relocate from this country and that is looking like one of the best decisions to take for the coming decade.
The Buharis, Atikus and Tinubus of this country are not going anywhere anytime soon and from all indications they have no concrete plans for the future of the country, the best we are doing is firing hashtags on Twitter and and playing bigotry with the present and future of the country.
I believe the best gift You can give your children and family is Education and a second Passport; One High-Value Passport and the Nigerian Passport just in case they want to come and trace their origins.
Usually, I give Gifts but this time, I do not think I owe anyone any.
I trust your Christmas was a merry one and I wish You a prosperous 2020 ahead.
Cheers to your best year yet!
I am Seun Ogunmola I help People and Organizations to leverage on Technology to achieve their goals Faster, Easier and Cheaper.
I also write on diverse subject areas including Finance, Business, Productivity and Governance.